Go Ask Daddy About Girl Presidents, Bustling Bakeries and Trucker Talk

girl presidents
photo credit: Surf ! via photopin (license)

It’s quite an age we live in.

GAD GRAPHICTrue, I can’t take my kids to the airport to watch planes take off anymore. Sept. 11 took care of that.

But they’ve seen some great things in their lifetimes.

Even though their parents vote Republican, the significance of our first minority president isn’t lost on the girls. Gay marriage is on the table, and reality in some places. Hardly anyone gets chickenpox anymore. And my girls have even lived in the age of southern NHL teams winning the Stanley Cup, for Rod Brind’Amour’s sake.

And they can’t believe there’s never been a “girl president.”

Isn’t that cool?

Can you believe it?

Here’s what else they’ve asked lately.

1. There’s never been a girl president?

Can you believe it?

Costa Rica (Laura Chinchilla), Denmark (Helle Thorning-Schmidt) and Liberia (Ellen Johnson-Sirleaf) have female presidents. Victoria Woodhull ran for the U.S. presidency in 1872, although there’s no official tally for her votes.

Michele Bachmann and Hillary Clinton have had designs on the White House.

Women can definitely lead and manage. You don’t have to look any further than your mom for proof. But if a woman president tidied up the American way … what would they talk about on CNN?

2. Have you ever been arrested?

I am the Hispanic-American anomaly – 41 years young, and never been handcuffed.

I passed the sobriety test, had my car searched, everything.

That’s kind of piggish of me to say, although I have been pulled over many times, while doing the speed limit. I hate to play the race card, but it’s been suggested I was probably guilty of DWH – driving while Hispanic.

I passed the sobriety test, had my car searched, everything. Two cops pulled me over coming out of the newspaper office late at night, and when I told them I was one of the only two sportswriters in town, one said, “never heard of ya.”

So a dude – no matter what color he is – just sorta holds his breath and waits for either his license and registration back. And hopes against a ticket or the billy club.

3. At Carlo’s, do they just make regular cakes until they get a special order?

They do, if the boss says so!

Carlo’s Bakery, the Hoboken hotspot in Cake Boss, is a victim of its own success. Yelp.com is loaded with tales of 3.5-hour waits, mixed reviews of the actual baked goods, and hefty price tags ($20 for a 1 lb. bag of cookies). Sounds like more spectacle than sweet spot.

I’d give $5 for a cannoli and to hear him give his crew the red-ass for burning cookies or something.

4. What does 10-4 mean?

It’s how policemen and truck drivers say “A-OK.”

10-4 is code in what’s known as ten signals, and means “affirmative.” As in, “Marie, did you get extra vanilla wafers for dad?” and you’d say, “10-4, papa.” 10-4 is better than 10-0, which means “death.”

So does 10-7. 10-2 means ok for now, and I think 10-363 means “extra cheese,” but I can’t confirm that.

The fellas who drive forklifts in membership warehouses use the term to acknowledge visual confirmation of new stock, customer requests, and pretty girls in shorts.

5. How old is Larry Allen’s daughter?

She’s in college, at Pepperdine University.

Jayla Allen wrote the Hall of Fame speech for her father, Larry Allen, who played lineman for the Dallas Cowboys for 12 years. She helped her father, a private, soft-spoken man, express his gratitude to teammates and family for helping him in his journey.

Your daddy’s not going to Cooperstown or Canton or anywhere to be enshrined, but do you think he feels the same way about his family?

Commanding and driven on the field, Allen needed sunglasses to mask the tears he shed during his Hall of Fame induction. Not bad for a kid from Compton, Calif., who’d been stabbed at age 11 – protecting his little brother.

Your daddy‘s not going to Cooperstown or Canton or anywhere to be enshrined, but do you think he feels the same way about his family?

10-4, girls. 10-4.

allen quote


  1. Re: 10 Codes – 5-5-2-2 is a Dumbass 10 – 4.

    5 – 2 is a half-ass 10 – 4.

    I’m just sayin’.


    1. Brilliant! I think I’ve been 5-2ing it most of my life, and didn’t even know what to call it.

  2. I’m surprised to read that a female ran for president in the 1800s. And it’s really a shame when a nice looking respectable man like yourself gets targeted for DWH. I really live in a sheltered white girl world. Although, a lot of the drivers I see pulled over in my city are women. So there is that stigma against the female driver, too. I’ve said it before , your girls are lucky to have such a smart dad.

    1. She was largely ignored and told she wasn’t a U.S. citizen, because she was a woman. And I’m no Erika Estrada, Kathy! I know the routine, though, and later in life, I’ve had fewer run-ins with the law. Police have radar guns with a display of your speed here, and I swear people buzz past it to try and beat the high score.

      Women drivers, too.

      I wouldn’t be all that smart without these kids, actually.

  3. I’m operating on minimal sleep today and trying to cram a full day’s work into a few hours so I can get ready for family descending on our house this afternoon. My point? My brain is overloaded, and I can’t come up with a quality comment. So, I’ll just say that I love your 5 for Fridays and you ROCK!

    1. Thanks Nicole! Slip a little rum in your Coke tonight. You’re welcome.

      1. you’ll love it more with a bit of a snip, pet.

  4. Tamara says:

    Ah, the old DWH! I drove with a Puerto Rican friend once from San Diego to Arizona. There was a lot of police presence for “border crossers”, as they call them along the way. So when I was the one behind the wheel, I was waved along happily. When it was my friend, we got pulled over a lot. It was tiresome, really.

    1. yeah, it’s a great American tradition. A Puerto Rican in the southwest should know the routine. They’re just doing their jobs, the police, I understand that. When possible, we should let our white friends drive us – but then, we risk alerting law enforcement of a possible hostage situation.

      “You OK, ma’am? Is this man with you? Just blink twice if you’re being held against your will, and our sniper will do the rest.”

  5. Rorybore says:

    Canada had a female Prime Minister — it was a fairly short tenure from June to November back in 1993, but technically…..it did happen. Unless you blinked. And of course, we still sing God Save the Queen up here.
    I guess 10 codes are different, because except for 10-4 which I presume is universal, the other 10 codes are different. I guess each police division has their own. For instance, I know a 10-12 is public drunkeness…..but I’ll have to 10-60 as to how I know that (subject is negative/not talking) 😉

    1. Ah – a June-to-November prime ministership. Good times.

      Why can’t everyone just do things like ‘merica does?

  6. Are Michele Bachmann and Hillary Clinton our only two upcoming choices? If so, maybe we should wait a little while longer for the long-awaited day. Oh wait, I don’t talk about politics online. But I am an equal-opportunity hater of those two. That’s neither here nor there – great list today!

    1. Even though she’s a dem, I’d vote for Kirsten Gillibrand. Wonder if she’d run. I’d also vote for NPR’s Renee Montagne.

      Glad you liked the list! Hey, we can’t leave all the political talk to Facebook can we?

  7. laurie27wsmith says:

    That’s a 10-4 good buddy. DWH, I like that. When I was a copper I fell under the banner of equal opportunity cop, I’d pull anybody up. It was surprising what you come up with. have a look at this Eli, you can skip the testicle one (though it is funny) and flash down to the driver’s one.

  8. I have decided a few things. 1) I love your blog. 2) I think you’re freaking hilarious. 3) My guess is that you would fun to argue with. But I’m afraid I might lose.

    1. I hate to ruin an awesome comment with my own words, but you’re right – you’d probably lose. Only because if I’m in danger of losing an argument, my go-to response is, “because Jennifer Lawrence.”

      Works every time.

  9. Dana says:

    Ooh – I have one! Tonight my daughter asked what 4/20 meant. So I had to tell her the truth – a code for smoking pot. Next time she asks a question like that I’m sending her to you!

    1. Nice! I think at Appalachian State, there’s royal status given to he who rents room 420 in the Holiday in on 4/20 and lights one up at 4:20.

      I should guest post and answer other bloggers’ tough kid questions. Bring it!

  10. Kim says:

    Oh – I’m so glad that you did more of the questions – fun to have some from the kids!!!

    1. Thanks Kim – I actually have a notebook full of their gems!

  11. Canada has had 1 female prime minister – from June 25, 1993 to November 4, 1993 – but she wasn’t something to brag about…

    1. I’d vote for Lisa Ray.

  12. You’re a brave soul, talking politics online. I’m too chicken, although I will say I think pretty similarly to you, from everything I’ve read so far. Irritating about the pulled over thing. Once I was the designated driver (we had gone to a wedding for one of my husband’s friends), but driving in an area I didn’t know well, and was pulled over because I apparently crossed over the yellow line a little bit. It’s not like I was driving in the wrong lane. But it was graduation night, unbeknownst to me, and I looked young. I was young. Just out of college, not high school though. My husband was laughing his *** off in the car, as they made me do all sorts of tests to make sure I wasn’t drunk, which of course I wasn’t. I was not amused.

    1. I know, right? But it can’t all be soccer and pizza.

      I had to count change in the officer’s hand, walk a straight line, touch my nose, everything. I’m glad he didn’t ask me to say the alphabet backward, because I’d have failed that.

      “Sorry officer, for changing lanes so many times,” I said. “But I didn’t know the intersection well. I thought I signaled each time, though.”

      “Oh, you did,” he said. “Get out of the car.”

      I didn’t even cross the double-yellow line.

  13. Well, you can inform your kids that in Canada we have had a woman Prime Minister, but sadly only for about 6 months! Still! It counts!

    1. They’ll think that’s cool. They already think your version of football is outrageous.

  14. I see that others have contributed info (is there a code for info?) about the female Canadian Prime Minister. I am not really up on codes, either. Except for 10-4, which I learned from TV – which is the source of much of my law enforcement knowledge.

    1. The code stuff is second in coolness only to the stuff waitresses say in a diner. Ever hear that code?

  15. I love the questions your kids ask, and the answers you give them. Bet these are answers/lessons they will never forget.

    I’ve been stopped a few times by the police, and always played the nurse card. Saved my 5-5-2-2 every time. 😀

    1. They keep me in business, that’s for sure. Thing is, I sometimes forget to read them the answers before I publish.

      The nurse card! Only card I could have pulled would have been my Little Ceasar’s card.

  16. And let’s not forget women Prime Ministers like Margaret Thatcher of the UK, Kim Campbell of Canada (OK bad example), and Julia Gillard of Australia. Thanks for the info on Buddy’s bakery. I was wondering if it was one of those places where the show doesn’t match the reality even though it’s a “reality” show. Sorry to hear about the DWH. We have some of the same thing here I hate to admit. In our case it’s DWFN or Driving While First Nations (i.e. Indian/Aboriginal). Great post Eli.

    1. Oh, there were several more, for sure. Poor Kim, I hear nothing but bad about her reign.

      I think Buddy’s bakery was probably a victim of its own success. You know how you take up a hobby, and it becomes a chore? That must be how it feels. No more arguments and fun time in the back. There’s cupcakes to make, from the moment you get there until past quittin’ time, probably.

      The DWH problem is small potatoes, really. As I’ve aged, my grey hair has obviously minimized the threat I pose to society.

      Thanks Nelson! Good to see you as always, brother.

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