First-time moms have a lot on their minds.
There seems to be an overwhelming desire to do everything right. Get the right books. Take the right prenatal vitamins. Easy on the vodka. You know the drill. But when the whistle blows, the game takes on a life of its own.
Today, Caroline from High Heels to Hidden Toys reveals her confessions of a first-time mom – and they have nothing to do with vodka.
Caroline is an alumnus of East Carolina, one of my alma mater’s rivals in Conference USA. But this is an equal opportunity blog, people. Even a Charlotte 49er can get along with a Pirate if the snacks are up to snuff.
When you get a chance, check out Caroline’s page, too.
It centers on ‘home, health and motherhood,’ which is a lot like ‘futbol, food and fatherhood,’ like you get around here. She writes about her adventure in training for a race and hates the Tar Heels (like a good girl should).
Her son plays with dolls and has a stroller. I’m cool with that.
When I was pregnant I tried to do all the “right” things. I exercised regularly, ate [mostly] well balanced meals, and avoided caffeine. I also read books and took classes. I remember being 30ish weeks pregnant and thinking, “This won’t be so hard, I got this”. After all, those books and the American Academy of Pediatrics have all the dos & don’ts outlined so nicely.
Then my son was born and my life was flipped upside down in the most amazing way possible. All of a sudden those “simple guidelines” didn’t feel so simple. How was I going to do everything “right?”
I quickly realized I couldn’t do everything “right”… And more importantly, I learned it’s okay not to. Once I was able to accept that, a weight was lifted and this whole parenting thing got a bit easier.
So instead of sparking yet another Mommy War that will perpetuate this idea of perfect parenting, I’m going to share some confessions… Because ya know what? It’s okay to be imperfect!
Confession… I supplemented with formula. The night I brought C home (I also gave him a paci! gasp!). I was horrified C would never latch again. We continued to nurse for 13 months! Nursing/formula– It doesn’t have to be all or nothing—it’s okay to do what works for you.
Confession… My son watches tv. The AAP recommends absolutely no tv before age two. This was a rule I tried reallllly hard to stick to. Last spring I had the worst sinus infection and was unable to entertain C, so we snuggled up in the recliner and flipped on some Baby Einstein. A year later he’s a smart, happy child. A little tv won’t hurt.
Confession… There are bumpers in my son’s crib. Most pediatricians warn against bumpers due to the risk of SIDS. I understand this; SIDS is a new parent’s worst nightmare. However, when your child is waking up 5+ times a night, screaming and horrified because one of his limbs wiggled its way between the crib slats, something’s got to change. After a few days of no sleep we invested in breathable bumpers so we could all sleep more soundly (thank goodness!).
Confession… I accidentally coslept with C on his first night home. Somewhere between midnight nursing sessions and countless diapers that eight and a half pounds of love and I drifted off to dreamland. I woke up in panic, filled with guilt. What if he rolled off the bed? What if I squished him? I had not prepared to cosleep and the AAP would have considered my bed filled with pillows and blankets a death trap.
Confession… We sleep trained at 5 months. Sleep training is quite possibly THE hottest topic I’ve come across in the parenting world. At four months C went through a major sleep regression; it was terrible! Nobody in my house slept for a solid month and our pediatrician suggested sleep training. I hated every second of it. Not only did I hate listening to my baby cry while anxiously staring at a timer, but I felt judgment on my every move. Even with the pediatrician’s blessing I was so ashamed.
So there you have it! Five confessions of a first time mom! I’m sure I’ll continue to struggle with what is “right” and what works for us, but for now I’m enjoying loving my little boy every minute of every day!
Do you have any parenting confessions? Non-parenting confessions? What advice do you have for a new parent?