It’s a jungle out there.
Hell, it’s a jungle in here. Any parent will tell you that. In the course of a day, our kids can take many forms of wildlife: Docile as a fawn. Prickly as a porcupine. Lazy as a panda. And this is all before they have breakfast.
And we haven’t even gotten to the sounds and smells.
Every month, I compile a post called 6 Words. Hemingway inspired it when he said any story can be told in a six-word sentence. I ask bloggers, friends, strangers, and a few strange blogger friends to respond to a prompt.
July is National Wild About Wildlife Month. In six words, tell what wildlife your kids best resemble, and how.
The results were … wild.
What would your six words be?
1. My kids scream like insane wildebeests!
Janine H., from Confessions of a Mommyaholic blog
2. Like wild monkeys, they scale everything.
Tricia M., from Raising Humans blog
3. Wild monkeys. No cage. My house.
Meredith S., from The Mom of the Year blog
4. more food on floor than mouths.
Rory, from Time Out for Mom blog
5. Kids are like birds, always chirping.
Cynthia, from You Signed Up For What?! blog
6. offspring laugh like hyenas on gas.
beth k., from i didn’t have my glasses on … blog
7. My kids lie around like sloths.
Rebecca G., from Frugalista blog
8. My girls, flitting, fluttering social Butterflies.
Megan L., from Meaningful Mommy blog
9. Boys are monkeys, shrieking over toys.
Kim, from Protean Mom blog
10. Wildlife? This place is a ZOO!
Rabia L., from The Liebers blog
11. My daughters’ rooms would scare rattlesnakes.
Debbie, from Heartbeats ~ Soulstains blog
12. With toys, as territorial as lions.
Gina T., from Full of It blog
13. Night owls with equal parts vulture.
Kim S., from Co-pilot Mom blog
14. Kids to devices: Moths to flames.
Mel, from According to Mags blog
15. My girls cling like baby monkeys.
Kerri, from Undiagnosed but OK blog
16. Like parrots attempting to sing opera.
Nicola Y., from Nikki Young Writes blog
17. Potty training means pissing in yards.
Shay, from Trashy Blog
18. Toddler want a cracker? He parrots.
Katie, from Pick Any Two blog
19. My boy: Boogie-boarding like a dolphin.
Norine M., from Science of Parenthood blog
20. She sleeps like a hibernating bear.
21. He’s as loyal as a Labrador.
Michele P. from Old Dog, New Tits blog
22. Bedtime brings opossum looking children (fakers!)
Rosie M., from Mail 4 Rosey blog
23. Like fish. Bubbles! Hello new friend.
Louise H., from Baby Gates Down blog
24. Pitter patter? More like elephant herd.
Joey R., from Big Teeth Clouds blog
25. My sons wrestle like bear cubs!
Marie, from Normal Everyday Life blog
26. Moods change faster than cheetahs run.
Lisa, from The Golden Spoons blog
27. Toddlers are worse than drunk monkeys!
Tarana K., from Sand in My Toes blog
28. My kids sleep more than sloths.
Dana H., from Kiss My List blog
29. My boys are dirtier than pigs.
Robin, from Masshole Mommy blog
30. Bucking broncos, laughing hyenas, screaming banshees.
Rachael, of Three Boys and a Mom blog
31. Daughters, like hippos, cute but volatile!
Georgia W., of Oatmeal Smiles blog
32. Hunter is buff like a buffalo.
Kim T., of Day with KT blog
33. Reiko hugs like a giant panda!
Rea A., of REAlity Bites blog
34. My toddler sleeps like a shark.
Caroline, of Fit Pink Mom blog
35. Dogs, kids, can’t pick up shit.
Alyson, of The Shitastrophy blog
36. Asleep, she hoots like an owl.
Tamara B., of Tamara Camera blog
37. My kids: louder than howler monkeys.
Lisa, from Notes from the Shallow End blog
38. Cantankerous, ravenous grizzlies awakening in spring.
Nicole G., of Work In Sweats Mama blog
39. My kids devour pizza like pack wolves.
Eli P., of Coach Daddy blog