Beautifully Awkward Project: Melissa’s Kickstarter Launch Party

photo credit: ShellyS via photopin cc

Once again, we welcome Melissa Bond to the CD.

Today, she’s here to tell us about her Kickstarter pre-launch Launch Party. Interviewing herself, even. That could be considered awkward. But it works out beautifully. More details on her project to come. It’s big, though. And it’s something I believe in.

I was glad to play a small (really small – you’ll see) part in the evening.

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So, the invitations for the Kickstarter pre-launch Launch Party didn’t go out.

Well, they went out – some of them at least – but it was a random confetti throw of invitations. Some algorithm got wonky with Paperless Post, I guess. It was totally messed up.

But some of them went out? A handful?
Well, this is the thing – my computer said that all these people had received and opened the invites but I happen to know that my friend Garrett was in the hospital in ICU with this awful autoimmune thing. Half of his face was frozen and he wasn’t in any kind of state to check his email. He definitely didn’t see the invite. So, yeah. Maybe a handful. Which is what made me a complete freak when the actual party arrived.

I had NO IDEA who or if anyone would show up.

And it’s not like this was some kind of spontaneous get together. This was a way for me to say, “Check out the book that I’ve spent – oh – five or so years working on.” God, I was out of my mind nervous.

photo credit: ecstaticist via photopin cc

I’d gone to the wine store and had a very respectable selection of desserts and my favorite little black dress on. And I kept reminding myself that I wasn’t in control, you know? I don’t dictate what happens in this world, I just do my best and show up.

But I still felt like I was going to just cry if no one came.

So, what happened?
Well, the first thing is that I was putting mascara on in the bathroom when I remembered that Eli had actually RSVP’d that he’d be attending. At least he got the invitation.

Anyway, I’m in the bathroom and I have this surge of excitement and happiness thinking that Eli might actually make the crazy move to come. I imagined him showing up on my doorstep like I didn’t live thousands of miles away and my nervousness changed to excitement. He’s a model of support and generosity and I just tucked that feeling into my pocket. And honestly, he’s such a good guy I wouldn’t put it past him. I mean, did you read last week’s blog about being a dad to his girls? I sent it to everyone I know.

Did he show up?
No. But by the time I realized he wouldn’t be there, the house was filling up. I knew it was crazy to think he’d come but that crazy thought felt good. He was a talisman that I kept in my pocket.

You kept Eli, the Daddy blogger in your pocket?
(Laughs) Yeah. I kept the Daddy blogger in my pocket. He kept me from totally losing my squash.

So, what was the evening about, again? Your pre-launch Launch for a Kickstarter?
Yeah. I’m launching a campaign on Kickstarter on October 28th. It’s taken me forever to get it together. Seriously, I had no idea. You’ve got to make a video and then find good music that doesn’t cost thousands of dollars; you’ve got to get a good image … just lots of stuff. The learning curve has been huge. But I’ve loved every minute. It’s the first time I’ve decided to put myself out there in a big way. I’m getting divorced, so it was a real kick in the pants.

Hey, kick in the pants – Kickstarter. That’s funny.

I’m glad you’re enjoying this.
Yeah. Thanks.

And the evening – it was good?
Wow … it was so, so good. There were the perfect amount of people and I had my Eli talisman and I just felt so grateful. I was hovering at the edge of tears all night.

So, we had some mingling and then I brought everyone into the living room and we had story time. I was sitting on a chair and everyone was on couches and on the floor around me and I just read them pieces out of the book.

Actually, I started with describing the book as a tsunami. I said that with tsunamis, the thing that’s most interesting is the people who survive. We want to hear about the woman who hangs onto that one tree for 24 hours while the water rushes by and the father who walks miles on a broken leg to find his son. We want to hear about the young girl who brings uncontaminated water to the father and son. Like that. We’re interested in the stories of how people make it.

So, Dear Little Fish is a survival story?
Yeah. It’s a survival story. And it’s funny. Because you can’t have something so tragic and not have a lot of crazy funny stuff that happens.

So, you read and then?
Well, I read the part about having my son Cassius and then our 2 a.m. run to the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit. It was five days before they diagnosed him with Down Syndrome. And then I read about going to a Sting concert when Cassius was five months old and feeling like the aging mama in a maternity shirt. That was funny – standing in line for beers with all the twenty-something’s and praying that milk didn’t leak through the pads I’d shoved into my bra. Gawd. That was the night that I saw the sign that said Section for those with Disabilities and I realized that those people were like my son and my heart just cracked. I ended up seeing this radiant boy in a wheelchair and our eyes locked and I blew him a kiss.

Really?
Yeah. We were both there to see Sting and I realized how I’d put up this artificial barrier around people with disabilities and in that moment it just evaporated.

And here’s the thing – the radiant boy kissed me back. He leaned as far out as he could, kissed the air and gave me this rapturous smile. It was magic.

Wow.
Yeah, wow. I got schooled with love.

So, was that it?
Well, then we showed the video that will be on my Kickstarter page once it goes live. Everyone loved it of course because the guys that did it are crazy talented. They’re also some of the kindest guys. Really, it just blows me away the talented and generous people that I’ve met in this process.

And I’m guessing that at some point you stopped freaking?
Oh yeah. I had my Eli talisman, so that helped getting past the fear that no one would show up. And when I read, I just kept telling myself that this book is my offering. I was on the threshold of trust and fear and I just stayed there. A few people were crying and I got choked up a couple of times, but the freaking part of me had definitely quelled. I was really, really happy.

So – a small, Kickstarter tsunami.
Yeah, exactly. That’s what Dear Little Fish is to me – my Kickstarter tsunami. I’m holding on and putting myself out there in ways that feel scarier than anything I’ve done.

But it’s worth it.

Every minute.

I wouldn’t trade it for anything.