Cars play an interesting role in my life.
My friend Rob, so anti-Chevy, anti-Yankees, and anti-smoking that he would describe his own personal kryptonites (we fellows have many) would be a cute girl driving a Chevy, smoking, in a Yankees cap. So goes the ironies of life.
Cars have faces, both in front and back – and Grace will show us where else faces reside in a future (and possible recurring) guest post.
I’ll notice and acknowledge any other drivers of white Pontiac Grand-Ams, especially any dirtier than mine. I’ll still see on the road makes and models of loves had and lost. There’s so many of them. Why is that? Are there more, or are we conditioned to see them?
Gabi, my Grand-Am, has a windshield crack that grows by the day.
Marie points it out as proof I don’t get the job done sometimes. “If you’d fixed it right away,” she points out, “it wouldn’t be this big!” She’s right. But I show her the Wunderlist app on my Windows phone as proof that I do have a to-do list.
Cars play roles in excellent songs, too.
I just don’t have time to check anything off it.
Cars play roles in excellent songs, too.
1. How do they get cars into malls?
Just driving around the smokeless cigarette and hoverboard kiosks would prove dastardly.
(I wonder if dudes giving cologne samples try and stop the driver.) The web is full of smart-arse answers, including helicopter and magic. I suspect right through the automatic doors, before opening hours, or by the loading dock.
That answer is far less cool than 3D printers or that cars are assembled part by part in front of the Orange Julius.
Holy smacks, I’d even drive a Chevy to get an Orange Julius right now.
2. What’s a torpedo?
It’s been described as a cigar-shaped, self-propelled, underwater missile.
Who’s to say cigars aren’t torpedo-shaped, self-stinking in-your-mouth tobacco products? The Dutch first fired torpedoes in 1585, or roughly during my second junior year in college. They were just floating boats they’d tow, full of explosives.
Like Super Bowls, torpedoes became bigger and more powerful.
Marine warfare continued to thrive, and, yadda yadda, the Navy even opened a torpedo station in Rhode Island, and developed torpedoes called the Howell and MK 27.
Like Super Bowls, torpedoes became bigger and more powerful. The modern-day Mk 50 is 9 feet long and 750 pounds. It can cover a range of 20,000 yards at 40 knots. That’s way faster than you can drive a Subaru in Carolina Place Mall.
3. Does Ronaldo play for Russia?
Ronaldo stars for Real Madrid and the Portuguese national team. He used to date Russian supermodel Irina Shayk. He also has a thing for female media members. I feel you there, bro. He’s moved on to a dancer, Alena Alexandrova.
She plastered his direct Instagrams to social media.
They’re also linked on WhatsApp. Because modern romance and whatnot.
4. What’s the hottest day of the summer?
In the Southwest, the hottest day of the summer can occur in early June, when the Rockies are still in the pennant race.
Depends on where you live – and how close you are to Russian dancers.
In the Southwest, it can occur in early June, when the Rockies are still in the pennant race. Lots of the West Coast doesn’t get its hot day until September, when the Rockies are thinking of next year.
On this map, anyone in the U.S. who knows on a map where they live can answer that question themselves:
Note: No one said a word about global warming on this post.
5. Does an elephant’s trunk point up to be good luck?
One of Elise’s early soccer teams nearly carried the nickname Elephants.
How cool? Elephants embody power, stability, strength, and wisdom. They also make cool noises. Some believe the trunk should face up, to let the good fortune rain down.
A downward facing trunk is bad news to most, although some think that means the good fortune gets spilled all over the place.
Given the Colts’ luck this season, they should have turned their helmet horseshoes upside down.
It’s like the argument over your horseshoe – hang it like the Colts helmet or upside down?
Given the Colts’ luck this season, they should have turned it upside down.
Go Ask Daddy is a weekly production based on nearly 400 questions my girls have asked. A fresh five are selected each week.
Got a question for a boy? Email it to firstname.lastname@example.org and submit it! I’ll answer them as they come in a post them.