Go Ask Daddy About Spiritual Coverups, Jerk Propulsion and Some Stats Behind Coach Daddy

GAD lede 7 8
photo credit: _DSF1395 via photopin (license)

This one time, mighty Amazin’ Grace backed out.

GAD GRAPHICI hate putting it that way. I feel like a kid – especially a girl – isn’t bound to compete at every turn. I don’t want any of my girls to feel obligated to take up the fight, for themselves, their families, their race, their gender … their anything.

I learned a ton when Grace took the high road before.

So she didn’t sign up for the LEGO Ninjango Obstacle Course a few weeks ago. I wrote about it here on the CD. She’d even picked out a friend to sign up with. She’d planned it all out, which parts she’s excel and which were better suited for her friend. We’ll call her Jaylen.

The deadline came and went. Grace, normally one to jump headlong into anything … shrugged it off.

I’m fine with that. Winners in Charlotte got a spot to compete in nationals in California later this year. Grace is the kid I most want to fly with. Maybe we’ll find another way. You know, when she has a road trip when she plays at Wake Forest and wants to bring daddy.

Oh, and congratulations Holly – you’re the winner of the Ninjango LEGO set! I’ll email you for details.

1. Do some religions make girls cover their skin?

photo credit: Bangkok, Halal Assembly via photopin (license)

Yes. And it’s not as black-and-white an issue as you might imagine.

It’s part of Islam. It’s a proclamation of humility and modesty. It’s not required of all sects of Islam. Mostly, wearing the hijab – a head scarf – or niqab – a covering for a woman’s face – is her choice. Doing so takes attention away from a woman’s physical features.

It allows who she is spiritually and intellectually to shine through. Not unlike what your school dress code does for you, girls. It’s not about labels and styles when you’re there for learning. It’s about who you are, and levels the playing field – not entirely, but a bit.

On the other hand …

In a spiritual sense, and as a dad of three girls, it feels archaic, too, from my perspective. So much of your personality personifies physically – Elise’s braids, Marie’s long hair, Grace’s tall sock bun.

You’re strong and beautiful, and in reverence for what God has created, you do things.

You play soccer, you play catch. You sing, you hike, you wrestle. Some of what you are gets expressed in how you look.

3. Has a gorilla killed someone who fell into its habitat?

photo credit: Gorilla via photopin (license)

I couldn’t find a news story saying that one had, but I did learn of other incidents similar to what happened in Cincinnati in May – but with different endings.

1985 | Before zoo officials chose to shoot and kill a silverback gorilla after a 3-year-old boy fell into his habitat, other children faced less tragic fates. A 5-year-old boy fell into a gorilla habitat in a United Kingdom zoo.

A male gorilla named Jambo rushed to the child, who lay unconscious. The boy woke up crying. Jambo ran scared, and zoo officials rushed in for the rescue.

1995 | Another 3-year-old fell into a Chicago zoo’s gorilla enclosure. He too was knocked unconscious. Binti Jua, a female gorilla, picked up the boy, while her baby rode her back. Like a good mom, Binti carried the boy to a door zoo officials accessed the habitat.

What can we learn from this?

YOUNG KIDS ARE RESOURCEFUL | Elise, as a preschooler, nearly fell one story in the UNC Greensboro library. She and I attended a health fair there. As I spoke to someone at a booth, with Elise at my side, she snuck away for just an instant.

It was long enough to slip halfway through a railing. I caught her hand as she began to fall. Kids fit in places they shouldn’t.

ZOOS NEED CHILDPROOFING | We keep them out of cookie jars (mostly). We grownups ought to take stock of how we can keep kids out of zoo exhibits, too. At home, we crawl around to look for danger potential. Zoo directors could hit their knees, too.

MAYBE GORILLAS DON’T BELONG IN BOXES | I know, I’d hate to miss out on the chance to see them up close, too. My girls associate me with my primate brethren. It’s not worth it, though. If we can’t keep them safe, we shouldn’t keep them.

3. Can we get a hoverboard?

photo credit: Self-balanching board via photopin (license)

Like silverbacks and san francisco giants fans, perhaps it’s best to leave hoverboards in the wild. Where they can burn in peace.

Unlike silverbacks, there are plenty of knockoffs on the market. (No comment on giants fans.) A Phunkeeduck hoverboard would set me back $1500. That’s worth more than Gabi and my entire baseball card/Star Wars figure/sports jerseys collection.

They banned them at work. I’m not sad about that. This dipshit had one and thought it also came with a free pass to cut in the pizza line at the café. Seriously, run over my toes, my laptop, even my bag of sunflower seeds. Don’t get in the way of me and my pizza.

So, no, girls, no hoverboards for you. I can’t take the chance that next you’ll be wearing Google Glass.

4. Why are car dealerships right next to each other?

So the sales staff can see with simple binoculars the types of plaid sports coats the competition wears.

There are a couple of reasons. Auto purchases aren’t usually made on impulse, like banana chips or V-neck T-shirts. (What? I go with what I know.) Instead, a consumer does a little homework. A consumer also wants to go where it’s possible to see not only your favorite choice, but also choices B and C.

If your dealership sells choice E, but you’re halfway across town and not on the Auto Mile every metro area has, well, you’ll likely lose out to choice F.

Also, there’s zoning. Hazards from a car dealership operation aren’t the same as, say, a chicken restaurant or hipster clothing boutique. (Close, though.) There’s chemicals and gasoline, and highly coveted items, such as car parts, cash, and entire cars.

It’s easier to shop and to police when you’re all in a row.

5. How many Go Ask Daddy questions have you answered?


Like, officially, right here on this blog?

I’ll estimate about 80 posts that fit the Go Ask Daddy format lurk in folders and archives. They used to be called Five for Friday, and I stole the idea from Katherine Roady’s blog. I used to jot questions down in a yellow notebook. But what if I lost that notebook?

Actually, I did lose that notebook for a while.

At five questions per pop, and 80ish posts (let’s make it 85), that would make 423 questions researched, thought out, contemplated, then delivered every Friday.

At five questions per pop, and 80ish posts (let’s make it 85), that would make 423 questions researched, thought out, contemplated, then delivered every Friday. Know what? There’s another 300-plus waiting in line.

And imagine all the ones you’ve asked that I’ve forgotten before I could jot them down.

Keep on keeping on, girls. Thanks for making these posts necessary.

questions quote


  1. Lyn says:

    Really, really enjoyed this particular post, Eli. And I loved the Henri Nouwen quote.

    1. Eli Pacheco says:

      Thank you, Lyn. You made this worth staying up til ungodly hours to complete. I will always live by that Nouwen quote!

    1. Eli Pacheco says:

      These kids keep my brain supple as Ellie Kemper’s smile, Carol.

  2. ksbeth says:

    your level of question answering/posing is quite high. like a wizard or old sage.

    1. Eli Pacheco says:

      does this mean I can have a pad on a mountaintop (with hopefully an NPR station in range)? I’m humbled by your vote, Beth.

  3. Kisma says:

    That quote wraps this post up in a beautiful bow! Thank you for starting my Friday off with the smiles!

    1. Eli Pacheco says:

      Sometimes I find just the right quote, like a delicious sopapilla after a plate full of enchiladas.

  4. Holly says:

    Students here are banned from not just using but having hoverboards on campus at all because of the battery fire/explosion risk. Apparently some colleges already had learned that lesson the hard way so they decided to be proactive here.

    I think you have more than one Holly who comments here, ya know 😀

    1. Eli Pacheco says:

      I was so sore about getting passed up for pizza I completely overlooked the whole fiery explosion angle, Holly.

      I wonder if nice kids ride hoverboards.

      I think you’re the Holly who won the LEGOs, you know.

  5. mocadeaux says:

    Hoverboards are awful. Now if someone wanted to get me a Segway, I wouldn’t say no to that. But I certainly wouldn’t cut in the cafeteria line on pizza day.

    1. Eli Pacheco says:

      The hoverboard is the Segway’s evil, pyromaniac cousin. Every day is pizza day, potentially, Mo. Why take a chance?

  6. amommasview says:

    Fantastic post, Eli. Love the questions and the way you answer them of course. And I truly love the quote at the end. How very true…

    1. Eli Pacheco says:

      Thanks, Sandra. There are some challenging questions, and I love my girls’ inquisitive minds.

      The quote couldn’t have fit better, if you ask me. Now, to go and do it …

  7. Great questions. Funny and entertaining that bring smiles on your face.

    1. Eli Pacheco says:

      Thank you! These girls keep me on my toes.

  8. stomperdad says:

    And as Kathrine Roady inspired you answer questions from your girls on your blog, you have inspired me to answer questions my boys. Thanks for that inspiration. All 3 of us enjoy it! Great answers this week. Love how you fielded the religious question. Those can be tricky sometimes.

    1. Eli Pacheco says:

      It’s like 7 degrees of blogging. I’m not sure Katherine still writes, but she was one of my first influences.

      Glad to have inspired you, brother. How many questions do our kids ask every day? It’s kind of cool to take a moment and answer them (and learn a little in the process).

      I’ll always take on the race and religion questions, my brother.

  9. Hi Eli,
    I love what you’ve done with the place!
    These questions felt especially poignant (and well-answered). I love that your girls come to you with questions, and that you can always find an answer. In my humble opinion, curiosity is one of the keys to a rich and happy life.
    And the link at the end?!?! It reminded me how much fun that post was to write together.
    Again, I’m sorry for being gone so long – gotta few cobwebs over at my place -thank goodness, I have a couple of sweet, young writers filling in while I hibernate 🙂

    1. Eli Pacheco says:

      Hey Michelle. I put a fresh coat of paint for a fresh start. Glad you liked the questions and answers – I never know what I’ll get in a Friday batch.

      That was one of my favorite posts ever to write. We should do something again. i figured you were off on a tropical island somewhere with a cold drink in your hand.

      1. In my dreams! Nose to the grindstone and all of that 🙂

      2. Eli Pacheco says:

        That’s my approach to a plate of tacos, too, Michelle.

  10. Hello Eli – have come over on strict (ish) instructions of A momma’s View. Enjoyed it. Shall be asking you random questions in future despite Giant’s references going over my head.

    1. Eli Pacheco says:

      Hugely thankful for Sandra’s assertion – it not only got you here, but got me there, to your page.

      Glad you liked this !There are 430+ more questions to answer, so I’m drinking more water, trying to live right, so I can be around for them all!

      I’m so ready for random questions, though. That should be a post. I should invite people to ask me stuff for a Go Ask Daddy post.

      1. Ha! That would be cool! You have a way with words so your answers hit just the right spot of humor and truth. Looking froward to it!

      2. Eli Pacheco says:

        I’m humbled by that comment! Thank you so much.

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