Go Ask Daddy About Punctuation, Cartoon Commerce and Nuances in Advertising


GAD lede 7 15
photo credit: J13 087 via photopin (license)

Grace has fired the questions at me fast and furious this week.

GAD GRAPHICThat’s what happens when you spend more than an hour a day in the car together. That, plus the hour or two she’s been at my side at work after I pick her up from theater camp. The final performance of Robin Hood happens today at 3. I can’t wait.

We’ve covered everything from politics to an OCD diagnosis (for me). As if.

Go Ask Daddy questions nearly reached 450 as a result. Not that I mind. I’m working on a new feature called Dadding in the Kitchen, to document my considerable struggles over the stove – and delicious consequences despite them. Also, look for more How To posts from me, an unlikely source.

I still have June photo challenge posts to put up, and that should surprise no one.

I have new friends I’ve yet to send blog links to (Oh hey, Cassie.) I’m talking with a cool new clothing line. Not for me – for the girls. My girls might review some of their cool surf- and yoga-inspired line and review them. For now, check their online catalog out.

Then there’s this post.

I fell asleep 13 times trying to pick the questions at random for today. I’m in the corner of a Harris-Teeter Starbuck’s, banging out what I can before a doctor’s appointment. Somewhere between work and Grace’s 3 p.m. theater camp finale, it’ll get done.

Or, afterward. There’s always room for everything, eventually.

Hope your summer’s going well.

1. What does coma mean?

A coma used to be the go-to medical condition in soap operas, back in the day.

Is it still? It’s been years since I took an interest in the goings on in Pine Valley, on All My Children (oh hey, Liza Colby.) We joke lots about comas, induced by sugar, laziness or Dog with a Blog marathons.

On TV, coma patients wake up confused but aware, like they just took a nice nap.

A coma isn’t a nice nap, though. Someone in a coma has likely suffered a head injury or has an infection that affects their brain. It renders them unconscious. Comas usually last a few weeks. A coma patient can return to a normal life, if damage to the brain isn’t severe.

2. Isn’t 94% of us water?

drink water
photo credit: Ice and Water via photopin (license)

Not even Aquaman himself can say that.

Infants have the highest water percentage, at 75%. No word on whether that decreases after a diaper change. Most people register at 50-65%, the majority in the 57-60% range. Lean tissue holds more water than the fatty. So probably Hope Solo has a higher water count than I do.

I wonder what percentage of me is Coke Zero.

Or rum. Or Vanilla Wafers, for that matter. Right now, there’s a certain percentage of me that’s sparkling blackberry/raspberry sparkling beverage and blueberry muffin. (Heck, I’m set for veggie and fruit servings for the day, right?)

3. What is Acme?

The dictionary definition calls acme a noun, synonymous with crest, apogee, and peak.

That’s not the Acme I knew as a child. Wile E. Coyote spent considerable coin with the Acme Corporation. They’re suppliers of all means of promising yet unsuccessful roadrunner destruction.

Before the days of Amazon and way before Amazon Prime, there were phone books.

Think the 1920s – in other words, my teen years. Companies would jockey for that golden top-of-the-heap spot in a phone book (before Google rankings meant a damn). Names that began with A went first, and if it began with A-C, like Acme?

That’s as golden as the Google golden triangle.

Acme just happens to stand for A Company Who Makes Everything. It’s a little known fact that Acme, with the slogan “Quality is our #1 dream,” was revealed eventually as “A wholly-owned subsidiary of Roadrunner Corporation.” Talk about plot twists.

4. Is WikiHow good?

What, the wiki part scares you off?

Wikipedia might not be a viable source for your next term paper, but the WikiHow page … well, it has mixed reviews, too. Commonsense Media, a consumer watchdog for parents, gives it 3 stars out of 5. And they’re tough to crack.

They seem to warn against movies in which characters raise their voices.

WikiHow can be a good source for how to do stuff. No one regulates effectiveness, not even Jesus. Although I’ve used it to try and fix Grace’s bike and make beef jerkey, you can also learn to How to Give Passive Aggressive Gifts for Christmas there, too.

This one is cool, too. [How to act like Sherlock Holmes]

5. Can you use other brand names in a commercial?

Yes, you can – but you can’t pretend you’re that brand.

Does that make sense? You can include Keebler in your Stauffer’s animal crackers ad, but you can’t make like you’re Keebler. Some brands choose to identify their competition as “the leading brand,” probably so they don’t give the big guys any free air time.

Think about it.

If you passed by a TV showing that animal crackers advert, and you just saw the Keebler part, you might start to Jones for some Keeblers. Epic fail. It gets sticky online. Brands bid on keywords for their competitors. That’s hardcore.

Dang. I gotta wrap this up. Have to leave soon for Grace’s performance. Hope she breaks a leg. Probably not the best thing to tell a thespian/soccer player

commercials quote

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9 thoughts on “Go Ask Daddy About Punctuation, Cartoon Commerce and Nuances in Advertising”

  1. Hey, Eli! Fun post! I certainly hope you don’t turn into a fizzy, bubbly, sparkly, beverage with a hint of fruit flavoring, but if you do, could you post instructions on WikiHow, because that would be cool. 🙂

    I hope Grace’s performance was a smashing success! Have a great weekend!

    1. Lulu! Thanks. I don’t hope for that fate at all, but if it must be – I’ll be ready. Grace wowed on Friday – and cracked the house up.

      Then, we had a hard time erasing the mustache drawn on her face (she was a prince!) Hope your weekend is great.

  2. Have there ever been a “Go Ask Daddy” segment that explains the meaning behind the custom of urging actors to break a leg? I’d look it up on Wikipedia but I trust you more.

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