I’ve just got that feeling.
I’m not worried about jinxing it. I never have. Things aren’t perfect. Are they ever? But optimism … it’s tough to cover up. It’s like that first day of warm sun in the spring. That first deep breath of a kickass meditation.
Or how your car smells like pizza the day after you bring home takeout. #mmmm
It’s like having your good shoes on with a huge hike ahead. Deciding on a lineup change your rival hasn’t seen yet. I’m not sure it’s a 2019 thing. I don’t know when it started. I know it was good today. Shifts. Adjustments. Rules set for me.
Intentions – that feel like previews, not pipe dreams.
I’m not sure what it all means. I’m thankful for the feeling, though. Because it radiates and dominates and soon I can’t even remember what ruminations felt like. Not like this. Not like knowing I’ll be okay, no matter what. I’m thankful for that.
What are you thankful for this week?
1-Moments of clunkiness. I wore a Hawaiian shirt, slacks two sizes too big, and sneakers bought at Wal-mart in Augusta, Ga. (With shoelaces from Wish!) And I had a kickass day. Also, I needed a haircut. The universe didn’t really care.
2-A chance to do cool things at work. I love writing my ass off. I love trying to motivate. In a soccer match, it’s that kid who struggles to keep up that I call out to. Just a little prod, a bit of encouragement. I feel like I’m doing that with some words at work, too.
3-Daughters who steal my clothes. They’re cuter in them. I get shirts back smelling nice. And ties are wrapped up in bows. I had to start a new pile of T-shirts that aren’t fitting me at the moment, but that I know they like. They still prefer the ones that fit me.
4-A spot by a salt lamp to start my day. Sure, the neighbor’s dog barks incessantly. But when the lamp goes on and the meditation starts out? He fades away. There’s just something about starting a day with this kind of energy.
5-My girls academy soccer teams. They’re so confident and sassy. They take my lineup notebook and write notes in it. They insisted on a selfie with me after a big win. They’re so fierce and quirky and remind me why I love being a girl dad so damned much.
6-Sutton and Madison looking out for me. They rally around me in ways I haven’t known much. I have their back, too. That’s why a 10 p.m. visit turned into a smorgasbord of eggs, chow mein, granola bars, and Cheerwine cake. Not all at once. Gross.
7-Dinner with the family. I’ve mindfully blocked off times for myself. Sunday evenings, in particular. Those nights are for me to make something for supper so good that all my girls won’t want to miss it. They’re talking homemade crunch wraps this week. Who’s in?
8-A plan. Now, to keep following the steps. It’s working. It’s like using those crazy body wrap things – and actually losing weight. I have momentum even when I fall flat. This is because I believe in my direction. In my station, no matter what. I’m where I belong.
9-Memories of needing warm underclothes on soccer game days. I love those early games when the air almost hangs frozen. It’s nature’s way of jumpstarting your soul. I can shed hoodies and windbreakers and feel badass because I also have on long johns.
10-Trader Joe’s (and Lidl) flour tortillas. It kills an ounce of my soul each time I buy tortillas. Great dishonor to my people. I’m convinced these stores have entrusted their tortillas to someone’s efficient and culinarily gifted abuelas. Todo tranquilo, amigo.