Go Ask Daddy About Awful Sequels, Organic Thuggery and the REAL Computer Age

photo credit: #003 Stormtrooper with a camera – Nature photographer via photopin (license)

I wasn’t bragging, but I said it.

“Writer’s block? Never heard of it,” I might have mentioned to a fellow blogger. Well, that is bragging, isn’t it?

You might not know that I don’t believe in jinxes.

To prove that, I once declared on our way into a rural Walmart between soccer matches that we’d win the rest of our games that season. “Dad!” the kids protested. “You just jinxed us!”

#BOAW: How a Boy Sees the Beauty of a Woman

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Sometimes a dude talks to a woman just to talk to a woman.

Honest. I watched the kids on the playground with a mom years ago. Idle talk. How old’s yours? That’s a fun age. Yeah. Mine’s older. That’s her. Yeah, the one hanging by her toes and singing P!nk songs. Sure, I’m proud – and surprised.

It was an AC/DC day this morning.

My toe hanger manager to sneak off the bars and ambled to my elbow. She stood breathless, hands on hips, like an Olympian waiting for the judges’ reaction to that. She sized up the young mom at my side.

Comparing and contrasting the wholesome lyrics of my youth with what passes as music today

photo credit: Stormtrooper via photopin (license)

Missing: One cheap little MP3 player and lots of 70’s stuff on it.

Last seen in the presence of a kid who looks a lot like me. DNA testing would be conclusive, I’m sure. It’s true … that’s AC/DC’s “Back in Black” and “Hells Bells” ringing in Madison’s ears through her stolen electronics.

But at least it’s not songs from role models Demi Lovato, Miley Cyrus, or Lil Kim.

I got the MP3 free for earning points after drinking more Coke products than recommended by the Surgeon General. (My pancreas may never rust if what they say about Coke’s bumper-cleansing properties rings true.)

10 things my girls should always remember.

Hey girls. I think of advice constantly for you three, but at all the wrong times. You know, while you’re asleep, or when I’m in traffic, or while I stand deep in thought at the urinal.

So, I’ll do what any reasonable dad in 2012 would do – I’ll write it as a blog post.

Listen up.