How to Shave Time and Money Like a Dad

EJP

There’s one promise I can make you today, right now.

I will never, ever curl my eyelashes.

Especially in my Pontiac Grand-Am, as I roll down highway 4-85.

Especially on the morning commute. (This happened, with a fellow motorist. Sixty-five-plus MPH, with an eyelash curler clipped one eye, then the other. I can judge and give dirty looks, even though when I eat animal cookies while I drive, I look down to see what animal it is, out of respect – for the animal.)

Monday Morning Quarterback: My Kid Beat Me In Fantasy Football – Again

It happened again.

No, I wasn’t banned from a CiCi’s Pizza. My kid, Elise, beat me.

In fantasy football.

It’s a bit old hat by now, because this is the second time it’s happened. And she’s pretty good at it. The past two seasons, she and I have been in the final four in the playoffs. If anyone thought dad was calling the shots for the kid, well, they don’t think that anymore.