My Body is an Automobile?

photo credit: Kalexanderson via photopin cc
photo credit: Kalexanderson via photopin cc

My body is an automobile.

But what kind? On days like today, I feel more out of the user-car lot than the Detroit Auto Show. Mary Widdicks of Outmanned Mommy recently compared her body to a temple in an honest and witty diatribe.

My body is like a vehicle. On a long and winding road.

Long ago, off the assembly line, I had sleek lines (ish). Innovative engineering. Sporty performance and precision responsiveness. I reached college not a sports car, but definitely potential of high performance. New-car smell and everything.

I didn’t stop traffic, but I could turn a head. It’s like that when you’re new. The latest models have that gloss, that fresh look that makes even last year’s model passé. Undinged doors. Pristine bumpers. A motor that revs with the power of youth.

The moment you drive off the lot? Depreciation begins.

photo credit: marcp_dmoz via photopin cc
photo credit: marcp_dmoz via photopin cc

Youth begets oblivion when it comes to such things.

It’s easy to get routine maintenance at first. Keep firing on all cylinders. A little TLC, sure. But when you’re fresh out of the showroom, you want to rev that engine on a Saturday night more than take corners with care.

I didn’t notice the first door dings. Or hiccup in acceleration. My first careless scrape with a concrete pillar is cause to stop the car, inspect the damage, rip an F-bomb, toss a baseball cap, even. But you have to drive off. Hope to do better.

And hey … that motor still roars like a lion. It’s all good.

I didn’t notice as the dashboard faded. Or one headlight dimmed. Or that a turn signal or backup light didn’t shine. Who has time for that? I’m a new model.

Before long, new models come out.With sleeker lines. And pristine bumpers.

They look silly. Like toys. Psh.

photo credit: chiolachic via photopin cc
photo credit: chiolachic via photopin cc

To say the rest happens in a blink of an eye implies you’re watching out for it. Cruising gives way to a commute. Babes in the backseat, to baby car seats. Hauling ass disappears and hauling kids becomes Job One.

There’s still beauty in it. I have to pull a load now, or cram a rocking chair into the trunk. Yikes, that’s a bad scratch. What did I just run over? Crap. Grocery carts and gravel roads take their toll. My sleek lines look boxy.

But I’m doing more significant work. I am dad, not daredevil.

I can still maintain. I can take time on a Saturday morning to check oil and fluids, work on the body a bit. At least give it a gleam. If I’m not lucky, there will be an event. Something that stops me in my tracks. A blown transmission.

Dead battery. Body-crushing collision.

How does this happen? Yesterday, I cruised. Today? I need the special motor oil for cars with extensive mileage. It’s not easy to find replacement parts. If I toss the keys to someone, they come with instructions.

Let ‘er warm up first.

Not too fast on the highway.

Easy on the curves.

photo credit: Mark J P via photopin cc
photo credit: Mark J P via photopin cc

The new models look downright space age. I’m in that spot, between the new model and classic.

I’m just an old beater.

Rust sets in. Failure of parts you didn’t even know existed. Their repair comes with expensive bills. Am I worth it? I don’t see as many of me on the road anymore. Some are in better shape. Many, far worse.

Is that a bungee cord holding that one together?

But, I motor on. I remember that left turns in conditions 35 degrees and lower make an awful noise. I don’t forget that the defroster doesn’t work in the back. I no longer come to a stoplight alongside someone and think, “I could take this guy.”

But there is still potential.

photo credit: Bev Goodwin via photopin cc
photo credit: Bev Goodwin via photopin cc

If I can just move, just maintain, just avoid the scrap heap …

I can become a classic.

A classic is either a survivor or a restoration. Survivors have lived right and weathered the bad weather and collisions and depreciation. Restorations fall into disrepair, but find a way back. Rust, buffed out. Flaws,  corrected.

With a little TLC, I can revive some of that precision and performance.

The lines? They’re classic now. They don’t blend so much into the grey fabric between youth and old age, but stand out a bit. Like experience and appreciation.

Classic cars’ beauty remains despite all that. Their divinity is in their place in history, a nod to how good things once were. They can turn heads – at a car show, hoods raised. Even those in sleek new models can appreciate a classic.

They’ve survived.

They’re reclaimed.

Their road doesn’t have to end.

With any luck, I’ll keep moving, too. Along that long and winding road.

cars quote


  1. I love it! Great twist from an old beater to the classic car. We should all be so lucky 😉

    1. Eli Pacheco says:

      Thanks for your post, which got this one rolling. Today, I’m going to try and start making this old beater a classic. Watch out.

  2. laurie27wsmith says:

    I can relate to this, I feel like the old Dodge truck that has rolled one too many times, been rear ended (keep it clean) and carried too many heavy loads. Now I’m being repaired and maintained yet still keeping an eye out for the tow truck.

    1. Eli Pacheco says:

      Wear and tear, right mate? Here’s to many more miles for us both.

      1. laurie27wsmith says:

        I might have to have my speedo wound back.

      2. Eli Pacheco says:

        I’ll just bust the screen on mine and become immortal. Or immoral? I can never keep those straight.

      3. laurie27wsmith says:

        Immortally immoral is the one Mate, oh for the stamina.

      4. Eli Pacheco says:

        I ain’t as good as I once was, but I’m as good once as I ever was.

      5. laurie27wsmith says:

        Or I’m as good as I think I was, once.

      6. Eli Pacheco says:

        In my mind, I was a legend.

      7. laurie27wsmith says:

        In mine I still am.

  3. ksbeth says:

    love this eli, great post and i can certainly identify.

    1. Eli Pacheco says:

      thanks … sometimes it’s hard to start up the engine in the morning, but when i get some momentum …

  4. There is beauty in living right and aging gracefully. What better aspiration than to become a true classic?

    1. Eli Pacheco says:

      Heck with gracefully – I’m ready to drag-race again. A classic, with a roaring 400-cubic-inch V8 engine.

  5. Eli, I love this post and seriously made getting older now not sound so awful, especially if you could compare it to an old, classic car!! 🙂

    1. Eli Pacheco says:

      It just takes time for your lines to come back into style, that’s all, Janine.

  6. tamaralikecamera says:

    Everything comes back in style. Older cars become something you want to keep around forever. And I imagine you have many, many more miles on you!

    1. Eli Pacheco says:

      I think with a new set of tires and a fuel pump, I could make it to my next oil change, at least! I’m starting up the Couch to 5K today …

  7. This turned out great, Eli! I hope to turn into a classic and try to keep from being thrown into the junkyard!

    1. Eli Pacheco says:

      Thanks Debbie! I’m not quite ready for the scrap heap.

  8. Kim says:

    Not gonna lie – there are days that I feel like a super cool sports car and then days that I feel like a clunky old beater!

    1. Eli Pacheco says:

      I’ll settle for a few as a economical two-seater, Kim!

  9. I’m probably beginning the depreciation phase right now, but I think I still have a few years to deny it! I like this comparison, though, I’ve never thought of it that way. I guess life is so versatile that you can really compare it (and maybe yourself?) to just about anything…within reason.

    1. Eli Pacheco says:

      We begin depreciation the moment we come off the lot, Amy – or, the hospital. You really should check out the post that inspired this one – check out the link.

      That’s the key … “within reason.” I have a hard time knowing what that is. Just ask my mom. Or kids. Or teachers.

  10. Oh-oh, my trunk and a shopping cart had en encounter just today.
    You know a classic has a story to tell, and it can show those carefree youngsters a thing or two.
    Keep cruisin’ – Shelley’s got you!

    1. Eli Pacheco says:

      Your car trunk or your trunk?

      Classic elegance trumps youthful cutter cutter every day of the week, TG. And yes … with Shelley fully charged and leading the way, life is a highway.

  11. Sandy Ramsey says:

    Doesn’t everybody love a classic car? I hope so. Excellent post, my friend. I can certainly identify!

    1. Eli Pacheco says:

      No one ever says, “man, I hate GTOs!” Thanks Sandy. Keep your motor runnin’.

  12. Rabia Lieber says:

    And this is why I’m glad I never required much from my cars except that they get me from point A to point B! That’s about all I can expect from myself lately. Anything else is just showing off!

    1. Eli Pacheco says:

      So, no racing stripes for you, Rabia? I’m just glad I can get started. Sometimes, even that is showing off.

  13. Dana says:

    For some reason, I am hearing the song “Greased Lightning” in my head. Remember the old beat up junker that was transformed into a real beauty? It only took a bunch of T-birds and the magic of cinema.

    1. Eli Pacheco says:

      Not “Little Red Corvette”? I hope I can transform like Greased Lightning too, and Olivia Newton John can have the keys. I’ll need a little more than the magic of cinema, but anything’s possible.

  14. Rorybore says:

    I’m like John Snow when it comes to cars: I know nothing.
    As long as it gets me from A to B, I don’t care (and quite honestly, I have fantasies that I am actually on a motorbike.) But my husband looked very concerned when one of the kids slammed into the side of our blue van …. and a ton of rust fell on the ground underneath. He didn’t look half as concerned when the same child tripped over their own feet and face planted on the driveway.
    It must be really bad.

    1. Eli Pacheco says:

      I know nothing about John Snow.

      I have fantasies that I’m an Elvis impersonator, but that’s neither here nor there.

      Rust is a bad sign, Rore. For the kid or the van. Plus, a kid’s mug will heal. Mostly. A rusty van will not.

  15. Stephanie says:

    You are the second person to mention Outmanned Mommy (that I’ve noticed) this week. If you and Christine recommend her…I’m off to make a new friend. And read a new blog! I love your comparison here, even though I was secretly hoping you wouldn’t be too hard on a certain age group. I’m not going to claim (out loud) where I fit in but I enjoyed reading all about it!

    1. Eli Pacheco says:

      She’s got some great stuff, Stephanie. Definitely worth the visit. She’s pretty funny. Oh, I didn’t want to be harsh on any age group … I feel like I’m headed toward becoming a classic. It’s a good feeling. Still lots of work to do.

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