There are no timeouts in soccer.
I wanted to call one, once. We’d taken a 1-0 lead against the state championship runners up from last season. They’d beaten up on us for years. But today, as we broke for halftime, we were up 1-0.
“Guys,” I said, “look casual, but let’s see if we can get to the parking lot without anyone noticing us …”
The girls laughed. We thought if we could sneak away now … well, they couldn’t score on us, could they? We lost 3-1. But that moment proved we’d reached a level we’d strived for. For years, really. We were good enough to get ahead of a bitter rival.
We get a lot of those moments in life and don’t always notice.
Life is often measured in the final scores. We lose sight of the value of losing 4 pounds and not 10, of getting most of the answers right, of making it almost all month, meditating every day. Those incremental wins mean something, too.
I’m grateful for them. What else am I grateful for today? Glad you asked.
1-Hayden having found a college home. In a backward turn of events, yesterday she received her acceptance letter. She signed her letter of intent a couple of weeks ago. The doctor says she can start running next week!
2-The increasing ability to remain level. Like getting up on Community School of Davidson for a flash, it sometimes shows quickly and fades. But my Zen muscles are getting stronger.
3-Progress. I can see progress. It’s like, microscopic sometimes, but it’s there. I haven’t missed a day yet of Couch to 5K. I’ve meditated for 31 consecutive days. And I haven’t lost my wallet for hours.
4-Being closer to who I want to be. Notice a theme? It’s kind of internal. I feel I’m better than I was last week. Things keep happening. I just find better ways to cope. And notice. And share when the chance arises. Also, to stay quiet.
5-Plans. Even when bumpy. I’ve kept grids for daily, weekly and monthly goals. Another sheet for the pie-in-sky stuff. (mmm. Pie.) Some days I check things off like a champ. Other times, it gets less traffic than the New York Knicks playoff hotline.
6-A renewed sense of peace. The circumstances don’t change much, but it’s what we do with it in our heads. I read that if we live in the past, we feel depressed. If we live in the future, we feel anxious. Only in the present can we avoid either one.
7-Those opportunities. Thank you universe! You never know when they’ll come and if you’re looking for the home run ball and only the home run ball, you’ll miss out. Sometimes they’re as subtle as vanilla ice cream but they.are.there.
8-Hayden’s recovery and outlook. Yes, Hayden again. She makes the fewest blog appearances of my girls. But I’m amazed at how diligent and patient she is in her recovery. She has such a great perspective when others might feel despair.
9-The chance to go to All-Star Weekend. Parts were rocky. But overall, how incredible. I met awesome people, saw the best NBA players and legends, and took a pic with Sue Bird. Oh, and Tony Dungy and the Utah Build-a-Bear. Oh, and this dude:
10-Surprising vibes. This universe has a sense of humor. I’ve curbed my expectations, not just to protect myself, but to open myself to things possible I hadn’t dreamed of. I’m ready. For lost laptop chargers and jackets found I thought were long gone. And all else.
What about you? What are you grateful for today?