So, it’s been a minute.
And by a minute, I mean a month. Holy hell – how did April get outta here so fast? Everyone’s wrapped up their #AtoZChallenge, and I’m still stretching my hamstrings. Yes, I’m on the letter F. And there’s plenty to post about.
I have a guest post from Madison, even, that she sent me as a PDF and why do post-millennials do things so differently than we do?
I also have a guest post from Lauren Mayhew that you’re going to love. And the rest of my posts about looking for my next job. I got plenty of words: What I don’t have is plenty of space in the day to write such things.
I’m getting better, though.
This is a 10-minute writing challenge on prompts from author Cheryl Strayed, who wrote Wild. Love that girl. The prompt: Write about a time when you’d dressed inappropriately for the occasion. So, here goes.
Aw, dad …
No boss, no church, no neighborhood watch has deemed my clothing inappropriate. (That I know of.)
My kids, though … they’ve disapproved of many things. Star Wars socks – pulled up to my knees. Roughed-up Colorado Rockies caps. Most means of facial hair and 100% of Warby Parker models I’ve tried on.
It should come as no surprise that today’s ensemble – my dad’s Panama Jack hat and a Swiss national team football shirt that Tamara of Part-time Working Hockey Mom sent as a gift – would raise equal ire from my squad of sisters.
I picked it out to go Tiger hunting – Woods, that is. You know,. Eldrick, the golfer, the former toast of the town turned roast of the planet. He committed late to the PGA Tour stop in Charlotte, but I got passes from work.
No, no, no … Camdyn said when she emerged from her room to find me hatted up.
Then, she took my dad’s Panama and plopped it on her own head. Granted, she was 31 times cuter than me in the battered old hat, but still. A dad’s got a right. And I’m not saying I’m ready to rock the kind of clothes Macklemore wanted in Thrift Shop, but …
The clearance aisle (and Goodwill!) have been very, very good to me.
Free stuff = dad magnet
Madison and her boyfriend were busy chasing Tiger when I got to Quail Hollow Club on the first day of the PGA Tournament. While they jockeyed to see the legend tee off, I got diverted to a tent giving away free stuff.
Because to a dad, free stuff is right up there with hats that make our kids cringe.
I like your hat, Kaehla said in the freebie tent. Her opinion counts. She’s Floridian, working for the company that let me play a life-sized version of Operation, and gave me a prize even though I lost in such a way that I’d have been in litagation faster than I could say Water on the Knee.
A cool hat is a great way to get the conversation started.
Finally, I got to see this Tiger Woods guy tee it up. Sort of. See, even in a cool hat, I’m still a short guy. I found daylight between a sunburned dude and a girl on her phone, but another sunburned dude got in my way.
I turned to the woman next to me – also struggling to see a damned thing, and also cool enough for a straw hat, but of a more refined nature. I guess.
Me: I’m just going to climb that tree and watch.
Her: (stifling an involuntary laugh.) I’d like to see that.
Me: I’ll be on the news. You’ll never forget me.
Her: Or you’ll be on the ground. And on the news. And Tiger will never forget you.
Me: Maybe I could stand on your shoulders.
Her: Negative. Just, no. Bad idea.
Me: I have lots of ideas. Some of them are really awful.
(Wearing this hat was definitely a great idea. As was watching Eldrick Woods tee off in that girl’s phone screen instead of climbing the tree.)
I wound up with video of El Tigre making a putt in the sun (behind another dude – this time a golfer – who stood in my way.)
I got swag, including a Chick-fil-A coupon and a skeleton-shaped ice pack.
Not to mention one whispered conversation that went wrong very fast.
There were tacos and no sunburn and time with my oldest watching sports. And wearing my dad’s hat, it was like I took him along for the ride. Maybe someday Madison will wear this hat with her kids.
Because it was her dad’s hat, also.
Other posts in the A to Z Challenge
A is for Approachable Stranger in Target
B is for Boy without a job
C is for Courtney Wright, guest blogger
E is for Is he EVER going to catch up?